S2EP30: THE SECRET QUESTION (WITH JUSTIN SILBERMAN)

Justin comes on with a SECRET question 😏 On our way there, we nerd out and discuss:

  • AI, The Black Box Effect, Dating and AI

  • Instagram = World’s largest dating app

  • The expectation of public access

  • Boundaries on social media when in a relationship

  • Dating with intention

  • Birth control and preventative measures

  • “Why buy the cow if you can get the milk for free?”

  • How dating requirements shift as we age and how the ecosystem gets smaller

  • Ultimate power corrupts ultimately

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Quotes from the episode


"Questioning societal norms and pressure like we are? Good."

"Get ready for playful banter, thought-provoking dialogue, and perspectives that'll make you rethink society as you know it."

"Instagram is kind of the world's largest dating app at this point."

"There's this democratization of celebrity happening within Instagram."

"AI may be playing us from the top down."

"We're living in a time where platforms are psychologically mindf*ing humans, and most people are unaware of it."

"Instagram has allowed access, and really the expectation of access, to anybody everywhere. It's an anomaly to have a private Instagram at this point."

"AI has this emergent behavior that even top engineers don't fully understand. We know how to build a neural network, but the black box effect means there's still so much we don't control."

"We're on the verge of folding supercomputer processing and quantum computing into AI. The change we'll see in our generation will be unparalleled."

"There's this democratization of pornography, celebrity, and even prostitution happening online, impacting fidelity and honesty within this ecosystem we all participate in."

"Even if you think you have free will, there are darker tactics at play."

"Social media keeps us plugged in, but at what cost?"

"Dating and technology—it's a complicated and challenging dynamic to manage."

"Instagram is a dopamine drip of validation. Where do you draw the line in relationships?"

"We’re manipulated into thinking we're in control, but are we?"

"The greatest minds and the most dollars all come together to do everything they can to keep you plugged into your device."

"Even if people think they're on these platforms on their own accord, there are tactics to keep them there and buying into the system for longer."

"Where do you draw the line as a partner in a relationship when social media becomes a part of the dynamic?"

"You have to hold romantic relationships with an open hand. People change, scenarios change—there's only so much you can control."

"Communication is the silver bullet—not necessarily for a successful relationship, but for a fruitful effort romantically."

"We are subject to shaping and control of our behavior in ways that aren't hyper prescriptive."

"Where do you draw that line in relationships with social media?"

"Social media is built with psychological marketing and darker manipulation tactics."

"It's not possible to agree 100% with someone's viewpoint. We all lie somewhere in the middle."

"Having more conversations in person is key. It's easy to be extreme online, but in-person dialogue fosters understanding."

"Society has allowed men to think it's on women to handle birth control, but it’s a shared responsibility."

"We need to normalize more open communication and take shared responsibility in every relationship decision."

"If you're too afraid to have the conversation, maybe you shouldn't be having sex with that person."

"The other part is having more conversations in person. It's easier to be extreme and hateful online, but in-person conversations allow for harder discussions and show that you can have different opinions without hating each other."

"Birth control was a leveling of the playing field, offering real sexual freedom for women, but now we're facing the long-term consequences that weren't fully understood when it was first introduced."

"Society has created the mindset that men can be more careless because women are the ones who have to either carry the child or decide on other options."

"In the context of sexual relationships, we need to normalize more open communication and take shared responsibility for our actions and choices."

"Anything that involves two parties where there is shared risk should always be a conversation. It’s on both parties, not just one."

"Why aren't we talking about mandatory vasectomies? It's about time men took on some of the burden."

"In your 20s, it's all about looks. But in your 30s, can he provide and be a partner in the real world?"

"Men are taught to pursue their whole lives. When the power balance shifts, can they handle it responsibly?"

"Never date the hottest guy in the room. It’s about finding high-value beyond the surface."

"If you're valuing superficial things, you’ll attract a superficial partner."

"The progression of dating changes as you get older. In your 20s, it's often about looks. But as women enter their 30s and beyond, they start to value a man's ability to provide and look for more in a partner."

"Men are taught to pursue, to hunt. When the tables turn, and they become 'high-value' due to their success, they often struggle to wield that newfound power responsibly."

"We need to get clear on what we truly value. If you're just looking for superficial things, you'll attract a partner who values the same. It's deeper values that sustain a lasting relationship."

"In dating, there’s a balance between valuing what a partner can provide and looking for deeper qualities that align with your long-term goals and values."

"As more women have careers and can provide for themselves, it raises their emotional expectations for men. It’s about finding a partner who can offer more than just financial support."

THANKS FOR SLIDING TF IN, Fangirl. <3

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S2EP31: MONEY HONEY

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S2EP29: Divine Timing